


Tell Me You Love Me

by LIA99



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bisexuality, Cannon-Divergance, Denial, F/F, F/M, It's just life, Long-Term Crush, Not too angsty, Unrequited Love, bi rosa, bi/pan gina, dianetti, idk what else, repressed sexual tension, soft but intense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-10-27 08:12:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17763053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LIA99/pseuds/LIA99
Summary: Why did Gina decided to leave the 99 even though she had destroyed the cyber-crimes unit? What happened during Game Night with the 99? Inspired on 5x10 Game Night.





	1. Time is running out

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the unoriginal summary, I finished writing this work last year, but I was too busy with college to revise and edit it. After that, I lost inspiration, so this isn't perfect.
> 
> Work title inspired on Tell Me You Love Me by Demi Lovato and chapter title inspired on Time Is Running Out by Muse.

Gina was taking care of 5-day-old Iggy with Milton. Even though she was so exhausted, and this was harder than she thought it’d be, she couldn’t have asked for a more perfect partner. Sure, he was a Boyle, but a good-looking one. His personality was similar to hers, he had a mystery ingredient that her past lovers and fiancés lacked. Also, the best part was that both could dance anywhere they wanted, just as if their lives were a musical or a dance competition. 

Gina had only 3 weeks left of maternity leave, so she and Milton organized themselves to take care of their precious baby. Since Milton was a professional snowboarder and winter was coming, he wouldn’t have much time available. However, he had time on Fridays and the weekends. Gina would take care of her in the afternoon after work and the nanny during the day.

When Iggy was 7-days-old, Gina was taking pictures of her while she slept peacefully in her crib. _She is the greatest baby in the history of babies because she came from this beautiful excellence._ A big slam interrupted her thoughts and activities. Milton said he went to buy some groceries including more diapers, so perhaps, it was him.

“Milton?” She was about to go to the living room. Suddenly, Iggy woke up crying. Gina instinctively raised her baby trying to console her “Shhhhh, it’s ok I got ya.” Milton went straight to the room. His protruding eyes glared at her while his nostrils began flaring. “Hiiiiii Milton... What’s going on?”

He took a big breath so he wouldn’t be too harsh or snap at Gina or Iggy, which was the least of what he wanted. “Gina, I love you and I really love Iggy, but I can’t do this anymore, I want to break up...”

“What? Why? We’ve just got a whole ass baby together, you can’t leave!”

“No, I can’t keep being with you, not when you already like somebody else.” Gina’s twinkling eyes grew out of their orbits and her heart stopped. “Yeah, I know about you and Rosa, you still like her, don’t you?” He raised his voice a little more than he intended, emphasizing the last couple of words. His words, although subtle, were full of deception, or at least that’s how Gina interpreted them.

“What the hell Milton!!! How do you know ‘bout that? And yes I _used_ to have feelings for Rosa but in the past!! The paaaast” Gina darted her gaze and lowered her brow while raising the pitch of the last word to prove her point.

“Ha no, you know I’m an expert in reading the body language, that’s my other passion after dancing and snowboarding. I saw how you looked at her that time when we were pregnant, and the other time, a few weeks ago, when we went to see Rosas’s epic interrogation. You know, the suspect laughed at her, so she intimidated him with her dagger and you were eye fucking her!!!”

“What the fuck Milton?! Stop analyzing all my damn moooves! I wasn’t even eye-fucking her. This is what friends do, it’s called platonic admiration!!!” The sudden rise of Gina’s voice caused Iggy to start crying again.

“Since when do you admire your friends more than yourself ha? and yeah, that’s the exact same look you used to give me at the start of our relationship, that’s your I-wanna-fuck-now look.”

“I don’t have feelings for Rosa anymore and that’s borderline controlling, Milton.” Gina and Milton started closing their distance while she spat those words with venom. No, she definitely wasn’t in love with Rosa anymore. She was getting irritated, because Milton, the man she was supposed to love didn’t believe her.

“Whatever, I’m leaving, we’re done. Have fun fucking Rosa...”

“Don’t you fucking dare...” Gina spat her words harshly while getting more furious each time. They walked to the living room while Iggy cried because of their parents’ distress. 

“Look, I’ll still take care of Iggy, I’ll give her money. We will coordinate that when things cool down.” Milton rolled his eyes as if he was remembering something. “Oh… and also when my spiritual advisor gives me obsidian to help me with my astral projection sessions.”

Gina rolled her eyes to the maximum. She couldn’t believe how similar they were “You know, it’s actually very normal to find other people pretty while on a relationship, that doesn’t mean I was going to cheat on you.”

“So you admit it, right?”

“What???” Gina crossed her eyebrows, her mouth slackening, “You know what, if you don’t get it, then leave!!!” Iggy’s sobs, which were caused by Gina’s raising voice, could be heard in the living room and she felt deep down guilty for making her cry.

She went back to her room to console Iggy with a lullaby, while Milton started packing. After a few minutes, when Iggy fell asleep, Gina put her on her crib. Milton left slamming the door after three hours of not looking at each other nor talking. Finally, she released the big breath she was holding and tears started running down her face.

Gina started crying softly. She really liked Milton, she was attracted to him and their personalities were oddly compatible. After mumbling her thoughts, she came to the conclusion that maybe she didn’t love him the way she thought she did. Walking to the kitchen, she found her best Borgoña wine bottle. Then, she came back to her room where Iggy’s crib was placed and started sipping alcohol from her glass while thinking. Milton was crazy for believing that she still had a crush on Rosa. True, there were still some remnants and she still thought that was Rosa very attractive, but she didn’t spend day and night fantasying sexually and romantically about her anymore. In fact, since she met him, her fantasies changed from Rosa to him.

Gina served herself another glass and gulped it faster, eyeing Iggy from the mini couch in the room. Thankfully, her baby was still asleep. For some weird reason, she didn’t feel as bad as she thought she’d feel. She started to realize even more that she had never loved Milton, but maybe the attraction she had for him could’ve turned into love. Now, that chance was ruined. She couldn’t continue with someone who reads every single move or the relationship would scar Iggy and her for life.

Perhaps she shouldn’t move too fast in her relationships, that’s most likely one of the reasons why they never lasted, to begin with. Gina gulped another drink, she started to feel tipsy now, but instead of becoming even more loud and confident, a wave of sadness flood inside her body and her eyes became watery. Maybe Charles was right even if she hated to admit it. Maybe she didn’t need someone new, but a person who is friends with first, which leads to Rosa, which... _Naaaaah stop!!_ Gina sat straight from the mini couch and her eyes widened. _A queen like you doesn’t deserve to go that crush path again, she’ll never return your feelings anyway, ughhhh I must stop drinking, I hate you Charles. And no, I’m 100% over Rosa now,_ she thought.

Gina dried her tears with her pink flannel shirt and came back to the kitchen to leave the wine bottle there. She tried to sleep, but she couldn’t. Her body was beyond tired but her mind. She thought about the company she wanted to make, a sport’s league for pets. She had been thinking about it for months and now that Milton was gone, she’d need the extra money. Maybe what she needed now, instead of a new partner, was a new life, away from the 99, to focus on her daughter and the business.

* * *

A week after the Milton incident had already passed. Gina had just made Iggy fall sleep after her screaming time, which seemed fun for Iggy, but not for her. She went to the living room wearing a sweatshirt with her name GINA written in big capital letters and sat on the big couch exaggerating a sigh out-loud. She didn’t have time to think with her glorious mind because someone unexpectedly rang the bell.

“Ughhhhhh” She protested rolling her eyes before answering the door. The faster, the better or else she’d never do it.

“Hey captain Holt, Terry, Charles” They smiled one by one and so did she until she saw Amy. “and I wanna sayyyyyy Allan?”

“Close, it’s Amy,” Charles said cheerfully, he obviously didn’t get the harmless joke. She made the rest of the squad enter to her living room and while they sat comfortably on the couches, she hoped they didn’t ask questions about the absence of Milton.

“We need your help, Gina.” Captain Holt stated with his serious and stoic tone that no one could decipher. Amy and Charles looked at her with puppy eyes.

“Gina, ugh I haven’t heard that name in a long time.” Holt highlighted the fact that she had her name written in her sweatshirt and Gina made a fair point that her baby couldn’t read. This implied that Milton hadn’t been in the house for a long time, even though it had only been a week.

The squad explained the whole issue, which was that since the sex crimes unit had been replaced with cyber crimes, they refused to follow superior’s orders to bring the internet back, which was not cool. They knew very well that Gina was the superior master of intimidation with a natural capacity for leadership.

“No, sorry I can’t. That’s precinct business and… well, I’ve left that life behind.” She replied to her friends’ pleas for help. She took into account what she had been reflecting this past week about having a new start. Sadly, her decision had already been made.

“But your maternity leave is over in two weeks.”

Gina felt irritated about Amy’s naiveness and teased her in a loud voice with ‘matching the volume’ joke she made earlier “Amy … VOLUMEEEEE” Gina could tell Amy was a bit terrified and guilty.

The same day at night, Gina decided to appear out of nothing and intimidate the cyber crimes unit, so the precinct could have their internet back. Several minutes after the squad left begging for her help, she felt flattered, confirming that her intimidation tactics would be perfect for the business world, not that she needed that confirmation, though _._ For her plan, it was better not to tell the squad a thing. The factor of surprise was the key to this act. _A Gina Linetti’s intimidation entrance has to be theatrical_ , she thought.

After her perfect execution, everyone’s shifts had ended already, so she had to come tomorrow to see if it had actually worked, which was obviously a yes. When they were close to the elevator doors she asked, “Heyyy guys have you seen Rosa?” All the squad, including Captain Holt, didn’t have any idea where she was. Gina sighed internally, but it was most likely she’d see her tomorrow, so she could say goodbye to her. 

The next day, Gina made the effort to come to the precinct way earlier than usual, to confirm the results of yesterday’s efforts. Something little inside of her hoped Rosa was there already. Inside the elevator, she fixed her blue flannel, which she picked carefully from her flannel collection, in case Rosa saw her.

She found Holt, Terry, Amy, Charles, Hitchcock and Scully inside, all of them eager from her presence. Still no signs of Rosa and even Jake was absent. All of them reunited close to Terry’s desktop to see if her efforts were worth it.

“Here we go…” Terry exclaimed nervously while looking at the ‘Unable to connect to the internet’ screen. “It’s loading!!” his eyes almost flew out of his orbits while he was in his seat.

Even Holt was very excited and screamed “We’ve got internet!!!!!!” which was unusual for him.

Gina smiled victoriously and pleased for what she had done “Alright I guess my work around here is done, guys.”

“How could we ever thank you?!!”

“I’ll tell you how. Use this precious internet, use it every day, keep multiple tabs open, stream videos in HD, leave comments on everything you can find, and most importantly, make your avatars … GIFs.” She was preparing herself to say goodbye to all the squad, but still no signs of Rosa. Maybe she could wait a little bit longer, but it was for the best to leave now. If she saw Rosa one more time, she’d never change her current lifestyle and wouldn’t get the new start that she wanted.

“I was thinking more like a pizza party when you come back to the precinct” Terry replied confused.

“Ohhh yeah so here’s the thing… I’m not coming back.”

“What...” Holt said, his breathing was suspended for a split second.

“Seriously?!” Charles protested.

“Yeah listen, I have a daughter now, when she grows up I wanna be doing something that makes her proud so I’m starting my own company.” She wasn’t lying when she said wanted to make her daughter proud. But technically, Gina knew she could still work at the 99 and plan the basics of her business.

“Oooh what is it?” Amy wondered.

“I’m running a sport’s league for other’s people pets.”

“Ohhhhh” Holt emphasized the O with his mouth while moving his eyes a little.

“Oh well, Gina as your college, best friend, brother, and ex-lover” Charles started being Charles, making Gina cringe a little, but she really loved him, as a brother, of course.

“Ewwww ughhh”

“I fully support your dreams, but, do you really wanna leave?” Charles continued talking puzzled.

Gina sighed mentally with sadness and hope. “My mind is made up, sooo this is Gina Linetti’s last grand exit from the 99.” She had to make this super dramatic, so she played music from her computer while no one was looking. She hopped and walked faster to the elevator while Amy said the last 'bye Gina'. A flashing thought crossed her mind about finding Rosa. _No Gina, it’s time for your fresh start now_.

That’s when she had the revelation that her feelings for the latina were returning. They had always been cyclic in nature. Some months it was a strong force, but somehow she’d end up burying them to the deepest parts of her soul. For this to be able to happen, it required a few more months and lots of casual sex. This pattern had always affected her relationships these past years, which was the reason why she never got into serious relationships since she saw her for the first time until she met Milton.

Outside, she looked at the 99th precinct for the last time, sighed, turned around and left. Her new life had begun. What Gina didn’t realize, is that, in this exact moment, the elevator doors opened where Rosa and Jake appeared together in silence, after Rosas’s parents went on board with Game Night instead of disowning her.

* * *

 

Another day has passed and Gina was once again, entering to the 99th precinct. She couldn’t do it. Not after Amy and Charles came to her house to give their blackmailing files and stuff she left, or the extra special speech they gave her about being the essence of the precinct and praise her superior problem-solving ability.

Once the elevator doors opened and stepped into the office, she saw a new man on her desk chair, with Captain Holt giving him instructions. She appeared out of nothing from the other empty desk, giving her signature surprise factor. Unsurprisingly, Holt listened to her demands, fired the man and rehired Gina. Moreover, both negotiated that she’d have one day per week to work on her company project.

She had to admit it, the post-pregnancy hormones were making her cry for the simplest things. She had to make sure nobody was around, besides Amy and Charles, to confess that they actually affected her final decision _and those damn hormones..._ Gina swirled her thoughts even more, _... maybe the return of my so-called feelings for Rosa are actually just pure hormones, like I’ve been crying way too much in private and other’s peoples' feelings have started to affect me. This is gonna be over in few months, I know it, just like I know everything._

She was still technically on maternity leave, she could just go back home, but she didn’t. She had seen almost all the squad these past few days, but Jake and Rosa. She didn’t saw her much either today and nobody in the precinct seemed to be worried.

While updating her social media status, or more accurately, using her Instagram to brag about her baby again, she mentally prepared herself for the moment she’d be seeing her. Her heart sped a little, reminding herself that it was just those damn post-pregnancy hormones. Nothing more, nothing less. Maybe she should have created another for Iggy to keep her distracted.

Scrolling her feed, she suddenly heard Jake’s voice. “Gina, welcome back!” Jake talked happily while raising his arms. Gina felt loved. “It’s great to see you. Hey, what’s everybody doing tonight?” He changed the subject even quicker than he’d always do. Gina was obviously going to say something, but thanks to the sudden interruption, she didn’t. His happy-go-lucky face changed to a weirdly serious and concerned one.

“Nothing, why?” Even Amy looked at him confused about his sudden seriousness and the unusual dropping of his vocal pitch.

“There’s something we all need to do.” He kept the seriousness of his face. “As you remember, Rosa came out to all of us a few days ago in the briefing room” Gina’s heart skipped a whole ass beat. As soon as she heard Rosas’s name, her ears perked up, her heart started racing while the excitement started to build up in the core of her body. Jake had all of her attention, now.

“Rosa did what??” Gina suddenly intervened. If she was hearing this correctly, then things could’ve been very different a few years ago.

“Oh right!!!!” Jake facepalmed. “I forgot you weren’t that day. Rosa might kill me for this, but she came out as bi bc she was afraid Boyle was going to tell someone, you know how he is.” Charles nodded.

“Yeah, I found out during our weird road trip at my cousins’ house in Texas, because she was talking to her girlfriend.”

Gina swallowed that information. The commissure of her lips threatened to form a smile. She pictured a mix of the screaming emoji with heart eyes emoji and the crying emoji. _It’s just the hormones, they’re just messing around with you._ Her heart started beating faster again, however, the thought of Rosa having another partner wasn’t her favorite thing in the world. But regardless, she was happy for her.

“So my gut was subconsciously right all along.” Gina waved her hands like this was nothing, as she recalled some buried memories.

“Wait, howww?!” Boyle exclaimed.

“Yeah Gina, we only know a few facts about Rosa, did she told you or something.” Amy felt disturbed about the fact that someone knew something that she didn’t. 

“No, you see, when I met her I felt some sort of a gay vibe. You know how am I with that stuff. I have a perfect gaydar, bi-dar or I’m-not-straight-dar and also can read people’s expressions and social cues perfectly.” Gina smiled because she would never doubt her abilities ever again. Truth is, she did felt a vibe, and for some reason, when she was making her blackmailing files on everyone she knew, she started looking for information about Rosa, but she never found anything about her. Actually, she wasn’t even going to create a blackmail file for her in the first place, but the vibes she was getting made her very curious and hopeful.

“So you why does Rosa need us?” Terry asked

“Oh yeah I forgot”

“I am assuming she came out to her parents, however, they thought being bisexual is not actually real, which is why she needs time away from them,” Holt said, as a matter of fact, maintaining his stoic expression.

“Yeah, how did you know that Cap?” Jake asked

“A similar situation happened when Kevin came out to his parents, and they also thought I had turned him gay with my…” he paused his words for half a second for extra emphasis, “…magical genitalia.”

Everyone made a small surprise gesture. “Yeah, basically what the Cap said, except for the magical genitalia part, that would be so weird and...”

“Jake, focus.” Amy spoke in an authoritative voice, even though she didn’t go to the power pose seminar, she found a TED talk about power poses in youtube. It’s not like she watched for curiosity.

“Oh yeah, sorry Ames. So in summary, she tricked me into helping her to come out to her parents in a restaurant for dinner. I kinda gave her the idea, though. Turns out, they thought we were dating. In the end, she came out as bi and stormed off, but her parents still invited her to game night. I went with her for support, and her parents basically told her that either way she’d only end up with a man and would have children, and that bisexuality wasn’t real, just a phase. So you know, Rosa stormed off from the house, you know, typical Rosa.” He laughed nervously, raising his vocal tone. “Then, the next day, her dad talked to her and apologized, but her mom wasn’t having it. In the end, they canceled game night.”

“Damn, Rosa must feel bad, especially now that she is closer with her parents since she got out of prison,” Terry commented.

“Yeah,” Jake glanced at the floor with a saddened expression, but he recovered quickly. “So tonight we’re bringing to her apartment...” Jake paused for a few seconds for emphasis “a special family game night, we’ll go every single week.” He raised his arms and voice as he had just solved a case.

* * *

 

Jake knocked on the door of Rosa’s apartment. She answered immediately with an incredulous stare and asked confused “What is going on?”. Meanwhile, Gina’s heartbeat was increasing each second.

“Family game night!!!” Rosas’s face had an expression that basically screamed ‘ _what the fuck do they know where I live?’_. Jake entered the apartment very quickly and Rosa had no other option than to let him and the squad in while a close-lipped smile threatened to build in. 

“Hey I brought twister,” Charles said, as a matter of fact. Rosa was even more confused. _Did Jake tell them about what happened at game night?_ Amy greeted with a warm ‘hey’ and rubbed her shoulder, while she started feeling grateful about her friends, despite the initial confusion.

Terry greeted her, followed by Hitchcock and Scully carrying big bags of cheetos and extremely unhealthy food.

Gina sighed while making eye contact with her. Gina’s extroverted nature said without even thinking with a soft smile “Uhhh, you know in another lifetime you and I would’ve made a hot ass couple.”

Rosa froze for a microsecond, but her usual face was restored. “Agreed.” Gina touched her shoulder lightly, smirking subtly. Gina didn’t regret saying this discreetly flirty comment, though. No one would think it was weird because this wasn’t out of character to say.

While she left Rosa’s side to be closer to the rest of the squad, Holt proclaimed a mini encouraging speech “Diaz you should be very proud of yourself, I know things aren’t exactly what you want them to be right now, but I promise they’ll approve.”

“Thank you captain.”

“Every time someone says who they are, the world becomes a better, more interesting place, so thank you.” He hugs Rosa, she froze for the sudden touchy gesture but she definitely hugged him back for a second. She felt happier and much better now. Her heart was so full.

Jake made a remark on how Rosa only had two wine glasses and that they would need more because they were all there. Of course, Rosa lived alone, so it wouldn’t make sense if she had more than two. “Thank you for doing this man”.

“Of course, we’ll be here every week.”

Jake was suddenly interrupted by Scully, “Rosa, I broke both of your wine glasses in your fridge door and in your bathroom.” Rosa stiffened her posture, her rigid muscles formed a threatening pose.

“Every single weeeeeeeek” Jake made emphasis with his exaggerated voice tone to break the awkwardness.

* * *

Game night was actually super fun. Everything seemed to be back to normal. Gina made fun of Amy a couple of times or just teased her lightly, according to her. Rosa and Jake were throwing darts, while Charles was cheering on Jake. Terry and Captain Holt were on the couch laughing and focusing on Jake and Rosa’s dart game.

Then, Jake invented a couple of crazy dares, which was guessing who would finish the pizza faster, Hitchcock or Scully. The captain, after computing some math and statistic equations in his head, guessed and won a symbolic prize. Gina started taking pictures of the squad while they were making the weirdest facial expressions. She was going to use this to make memes.

Charles set up a twister game, where Rosa and Amy lasted until the end after the rest lost, especially Charles who was first one to lose. Finally, Rosas’s ballet and gymnastic skills came in hand, because she had the last victory. Gina went through her phone and posted some of the squad memes on her twitter to the delight of her followers.

After a while, everyone was drinking and laughing about silly stuff. Rosa and Gina were siting next to each other on the couch, both relaxing their postures. At first, they kept a small but safe distance between each other. As Holt narrated his anecdotes of his best cases, as per Jake’s request, without realizing, the two women gradually and instinctively closed the gap between them. It was until Rosa put her arm behind Gina, that both of their heads turned and made intense eye contact. The corner of Rosas’s mouth threatened to form a smile but she stopped until Gina broke it after smirking subtly.

After a while, both were starting to feel tipsy but not enough to leave that territory. Gina complained to the squad about a florist she ran away this morning that kept invalidating her parenting skills, Charles said that the florist had good intentions. Terry, who was supposed to defend Gina because he was a parent but so was Charles, was too drunk to suggest something, 4 drink Amy was all over Jake. The captain was in the bathroom. Rosa was the only one who validated Gina’s annoyance, her dark eyes softening.

The squad dispersed after some time, leaving Rosa and Gina together and closer to each other. Rosa became more talkative as she kept drinking, but thankfully, she wasn’t drunk yet. Both laughed together, like the old times, they kept judging people together. This time, it was Rosa complaining about the dude who was fixing her motorcycle and how he was way too friendly. Rosa would’ve fixed her bike herself, but was way too busy leading the most important task force and the amount of paperwork required. Rosa gave Gina permission to insult him.

Once she gained courage, Rosa decided to finish with what was bothering her since Gina made that flirty comment. She gulped another shot of whiskey very quickly “What’s up with that comment about being a hot ass couple?”

Gina almost choked on her beer “ahhh Rosa, my dear Rosa, you know, since I’m very hot and I told you once that men are at least 30% attracted to me and you’re very attractive too so…” She slurred her words a little, totally taken out of guard. She didn’t know what to say this time.

“Gina get to the point” Rosa didn’t have time for rambling. She wanted a direct and concise answer, so she got a bit annoyed, which was expressed by her the slight grind of her teeth and slight aggressive vocal tone.

“Ahm can we talk in private? I don’t want to say this in front of the whole squad” Gina’s eyes expressed a glance of worry, while her heart was already pounding on her sleeve.

“They’re all drunk and I’m tipsy so?” Rosa shrugged, her hands clenching briefly, then releasing them. _Whatever she has to tell me, it isn’t a big deal_.

“Rosa…” Gina hesitated choked with emotion, her blue eyes appearing wetand her eyebrows drew together. She did not want to do this.

“Ok let’s go to my room, but do not tell anyone I let you in or I’ll handcuff you in the interrogation room for 3 hours.” Rosa subconsciously thrust out her chest.

Gina’s eyebrows suddenly relaxed, her cheeks tinted light pink while she smirked internally “Ohhhh you’re the kinky type why am I no surprised.”

Rosa felt her cheeks go warm. _This has nothing to do with Gina. Must be the whiskey_. She did not want to feel like that about the civilian administrator ever again, thankfully, she was sober enough to maintain an inexpressive face. “No funny business Gina c’mom.” She gestured with her fingers a come hither sign while raising one eyebrow. Gina touched her face and followed Rosa to her room.

Rosas’s room was not how she, or anyone that knew her, imagined it. It was small and cozy, with blue and green candles for a pop of color. It gave an intimate feel. Once they were inside, Rosa looked at Gina with a serious facial expression while crossing her arms waiting for her to talk. The small size of the room made them stand close face to face, both leaning forward, next to the bed.

With a big sigh and stroking her throat, Gina confessed “Ammm… I actually… I actually had feelings for you a few years ago.” she stuttered a little, which was very unlikely for a superior being like her.

Rosas’s eyes grew out of her orbits while her heart sped up. Her whole demeanor changed, and her stoic face disappeared. “Oh my god, why did you never tell meeeeee?????!!!!!!” Her tone of voice changed significantly, she was flooded with the sensation of warmth. Gina noticed the slight blushing tone on the Latina’s cheeks “I’m tipsy and I’m going to regret this in the morning but I had feelings for you too, dummy” Rosa’s mouth became moist and stared at Gina with her dark hypnotizing eyes, but broke eye contact soon to stare at her dumb hat, perfect for the winter, but still, like all hats, it was dumb.

Gina’s eyes grew wide and her knees felt weak. “Holy shit Rosa, why didn’t you tell me??”

“No, why didn’t you tell me.” Rosa brushed her hand against Gina’s forearm, her nerve endings tingling.

“When I met you, i felt some sort of gay vibe around you, but I wasn’t really sure, so I decided find the gay or bi evidence I was looking for, but couldn’t find anything about you. And I’m an expert on finding stuff about other people’s lives. So I decided to use real life cues and since you always talked about men and your dates and hookups, I assumed for the first in my life that maybe I was wrong.” Gina touched Rosas’s shoulder, her heart wouldn’t stop dancing.

“So you tried to move on because getting a deeper crush on a straight woman isn’t fun at all” Rosa completed the sentence feeling every single of Gina’s fingers.

“Exactly, Gina Linetti has standards” Gina smiled and teasingly winked at Rosa.

Rosa playfully rolled her eyes, because of the winking but quickly regained her usual face, however she almost laughed. Almost. “Ugh I don’t blame you, strong straight women crushes are the worst.” There was an awkward silence, where both could hear each other breath, the warmth stroking her cheeks. Rosa took another shot of whiskey.“If that makes you feel better, I thought you were straight, too”

“Naaah I don’t like to label myself. I’m above the label system this society has put us on, but I don’t have an issue with people who use labels.” Gina looked at the sky while she elaborated her next thought. “But if I had to use one I guess I’ll describe myself as a bisexual butterfly.”

She smiled at the statement Gina said. Rosa wasn’t going to tell her about her strong feelings. She hated that kind of conversation, but for some reason she wanted to, so she could close that chapter of her life. She was dating “Tiffanny” and liked her very much, but she needed to tell the whole truth to Gina. Rosa excused herself off the room and found the squad playing monopoly loudly, making strident jokes left and right.

“Heyyy Rosa come and play twister with us, we’re finishing monopolaaaayayayay. “ Jake screamed childishly, suddenly he broke the playfulness and became serious “Where’s Gina?” He was obviously drunk as the rest of the squad.

Completely ignoring his question about her, She said “Keep playing man, I have stuff to do.”

Rosa came back to the room with a whiskey bottle and another glass. She found Gina playing with her phone. The light of the screen made Gina’s blue eyes glow gracefully, but it’s not like Rosa noticed.

“Another one?” Gina moved closer to her.

“Yeah. I need to tell you the truth about my” she paused and made an uncomfortable face, “old feelings.” Rosa gulped 2 more glasses of whiskey, cleared her throat and started talking.

 


	2. Paranoid Android

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gina reflects on painful memories about her "Unrequited love" for Rosa. Inspired on 4x06 Monster in the closet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the kudos and comments on the previous chapter. I'm so sorry for taking way too long to update. I had already written the second chapter last year but needed editing. Truth is, my mental health is crap, so editing has been excruciatingly difficult. Don't worry guys, now I'm on meds and therapy, so I'll get better, I hope.

“I had a strong crush on you, and didn’t tell you because, as I said, I thought you were straight, so that meant that there was a 100% chance that you would reject me, which would’ve made things pretty awkward.”

Back in college, Rosa was crushing a little bit on a girl from class, Carice. Like with all of her crushes, she asked her out by letting her know where they were going, however, she was rejected because Carice was straight. That was ok, she had thought about that possibility so it wasn’t a surprise at all. Carice didn’t mind this incident, however, they avoided each other like the plague, and since they shared the same classes, it made everything extremely uncomfortable. Although Rosa was ok with silence, this didn’t feel right.

She decided to not make the same mistake while she was crushing on Gina. Her feelings started to gradually grow whenever they spent time together. Despite trying to move on, the burning passion started to build up on the inside. Normally, she would have removed herself out from the situation by ignoring Gina. What Rosa didn’t see coming was how impossible this would be. The auburn haired woman was too irresistible for her own good.

She made great efforts to forget her growing crush by boning strangers in Montreal and getting boyfriends and girlfriends. She even accepted and almost went on a date with Boyle, even though she was dating another guy. Gina would never love her back. It wasn’t until she met Marcus, that she finally could put those feelings at rest.

At least that was what Rosa thought.

The two women didn’t realize how close both were, Rosa against the white wall, her tan skin illuminated by the candles on her nightstand, and Gina’s arm was stretched so her hand was touching the wall. Rosa’s stare was captivating. Gina was mesmerized. They were alone and no one else in the world existed.

“So…” Rosa broke the magical, out of the body experience type of eye contact. “I guess we’ve moved on and everything can be back to normal when we come back to work. I mean, you have a whole ass baby with Milton,” the black-haired woman smirked annoyed, “… and he’s perfect for you. Also, I’m dating my girlfriend now.” Rosa chuckled and raised her eyebrows funnily. She was starting to leave the tipsy territory and start getting a bit drunk.

“Yeah, about that...” Gina felt something strange and urgent. They made eye contact again, she looked intensively into her dark brown eyes. Her heart was pounding. She looked at Rosa’s beautiful soft lips one more time, and without realizing it, her lips were brushing against the mouth of her long-term crush.

Rosa froze.

But 1 second later, she was kissing back, following Gina’s lead. Rosas’s mouth tasted like whiskey, the caress of her lips was the softest thing Gina has ever felt. The latina teased tentatively with her tongue, and Gina parted her lips with a low moan.

Rosa was savoring her lips. Nothing else was in her mind until it created a vision of her girlfriend. Suddenly, she pushed Gina away. It’s not like her feelings for “Tiffany” had stopped either.

Pacing back and forth in the dimly lit room, she spoke “Gina, this is not the right time. I have a girlfriend and I really like her.” Rosa emphasized her last words and left the room before Gina could stop her.

Gina was stunned. Her heart was shrinking, her chest was tight. She sagged against the wall as if defeated, reaching out to steady herself. Rosa had already moved on and for some reason that hurt. It hurt so much that she felt that time had stopped.

She should move on too and not wallow herself in self-pity, even if she saw the heartbreaking emoji while getting dizzy. This was definitely the worst timing during Gina’s dating history.

She decided to have another drink and played with the squad for a few minutes. Both women avoided each other, sometimes she caught herself glancing at Rosa, but the painful tightness on her throat was so bad, that she invented an excuse and left immediately.

* * *

She came back to her apartment, her body feeling cold. She thought about the saddest emojis and how they represented her at this moment. After all, the English language was too complex to include all these newly found emotions. She wanted to drink more to forget about this sadness, then come back on Monday fresh and ready to work. She started emptily at the walls while spilling some tears, releasing the painful tension of her knotted throat. The aching of her chest and her runny noise made her uncomfortable.

While she was recalling how her feelings were coming back slowly for months and how she loathed its innocent transformation into a blast, she poured wine in her cup. Then she remembered all the happy times with Milton. Maybe she shouldn’t have had a child with him during its passionate honeymoon phase.

Wait, no.

No.

She stopped herself right there. Iggy was the best thing that has ever happened to her. It didn’t matter now. She was 38 now, not a teenager or a jobless twenty-something. She could take care of Iggy alone.

As time went on, in the middle of pregnancy, her feelings for him started to dim, but that was normal since the honeymoon phase was over. She began to hang out with Rosa more outside of work, her feelings returned slowly without realizing it. Sadly, after that, the light of her life and their best friend, Jake, were framed with bank robbery by Melanie Hawkins. They lost the trial. It was the most devastating moment in her life, however, she coped during those six months by focusing on her relationship with Milton and her pregnancy.

While she gulped another cup of liquor, tasting the burning sensation in her throat, her working brain cells reminded her of Pimento and Rosa. By the time they started dating, she was single and hence, her feelings for Rosa had become stronger. At first, she didn’t realize it, because everyone seemed annoyed and uncomfortable about their sexual chemistry, which was out of the roof. She felt disgusted, but brushed it off, focusing on her social media count and helping Captain Holt.

It was a rollercoaster of emotions. They got engaged casually, which made her feel defeated, followed by the sound of her shattering heart. Despite that, she managed to have fun planning and having three bachelorette party with Amy, Rosa and Charles. By the end of the celebrations, at Shaw’s, she saw and felt how happy her crush was with him. She didn’t want to destroy it. She loved whenever Rosa smiled, it made her heart race and her knees weak. Not being able to bear this, she decided to hook up with a hot dude, and pretending to be happy, she left the bar. 

A few days later, someone wanted Pimento dead, so he ran away while everyone worked on the case to save him. Deep down, she felt relieved, because she hated him but pretended to be neutral about it. However, she was scared of how would Rosa feel if something happened to him. Rosa wasn’t feeling sad, because she was very optimistic that he would come back and get married. The truth was that hypothetically, if Pimento died, then Rosa wouldn’t be herself anymore, which was terrifying.

When he came back, they decided to get married the next day. 

 _How the hell did that happen?_  

The inhaled air got stuck in her throat.

Her heart wrenched.

The muscles of her jaw became tense and sore.

Grinding her teeth, she smiled and her blood pressure lifted. She wanted the love of her life to be happy, so she decided not to sabotage anything or be extra. She made her friends believe that she was 100% onboard with this, especially after Jake asked her to go with him and Pimento to get those damn earrings.

* * *

“So big day, how are you feeling buddy?” Jake asked Pimento. The latter was sitting next to Jake, who was driving.

“Good! Giddy” Pimento affirmed while looking at her.

She smiled at him unnaturally. Reminding herself that Rosa was in good hands, she calmed herself down. After all, a goddess like her didn’t need anyone to be happy. She needed to let Rosa go.

“Hahaha I’ve never felt giddy before. Didn’t realize how close it was to hungry.” Pimento continued.

“You know, it’s possible you’re just hungry. When was the last time you ate?” Jake asked concerned. Gina kept smiling and smirking subtly while grinding her teeth, her jaw was taut.

“Uh, three days ago?”

“Ah.” Jake exclaimed.

 _C’mon Gina you can do it, just make small talk with him to see if Rosa is in good hands,_ “You excited for being married?”

“Yeah! I love Rosa. I can’t wait to just jam my tongue in her earholes, and eat the hair off her head. Hoo! I’m giddy.” The hairy dude jiggled like a kid on Christmas’s eve.

“Aw, that’s cute.” Gina tried to keep her facade while smiling, her jaw was about to explode. _Well, it seems that they were made for each other_ , she thought, trying to be optimistic.

But that was until Pimento’s severe PTSD got the best of him. Apparently, the universe was sending a sign that he shouldn’t marry Rosa, after finding out that the 381 had been burned down with the so-called blessed earrings. Gina rolled her eyes at how annoying she found him. But then, maybe if someone gave him validation, he wouldn’t marry her.

“No, Jake. You don’t understand. The universe is sending me a sign.” He tried to explain it calmly, however, he didn’t keep his cool. “And when the universe talks, I listen!” The way he emphasized the last word made her cringe internally. Yes, she believed in the universe and sometimes she may listen to the signs, but they were more like a guide and not 100% definitive. Pimento was sick.

“Well, I personally don’t even believe in signs, so…”

“What? Then you deserve to die.” Jake shook a bit. “The sign was real, if I ignore it and marry Rosa anyway, I’m basically asking the universe to stomp on my balls.” _Mmmm maybe this situation isn’t bad after all. I should maintain my worried face._

“Ok good point, hey Gina, I could use your help here.” Jake’s speech was faster, his gaze bouncing from place to place. She exchanged a look with Jake while biting her lip. Her answer could have the biggest impact on the universe. “You wanna maybe weigh in on this one?”

“Yeah, sure” _It’s now or never, Gina_. She turned to face Pimento and with an alert gaze, she replied hoping for the best, “You’re right. The marriage is cursed.”

Pimento nodded to prove his point that he was right all along. Jake was utterly horrified.

“I’m sorry, Jake, it’s an omen, and I’m not taking your side against the universes. It’s hundreds of years old!!” Jake facepalmed. Gina surely made herself look more convincing. Thankfully, her childhood best friend knew she took horoscopes and astrology seriously.

Since Jake wanted the marriage to happen, he kept asking Pimento what did they need to prove the universe wrong. Gina answered immediately, with a flitting gaze, that they needed to find his grandma’s earrings or cut Rosas’s ears off, so the earrings wouldn’t even make sense.

Suddenly, Gina changed her mind. It was obvious they wouldn’t find those cursed earrings. This wedding shouldn’t happen at all. If she kept acting like this, she’d have her first Oscar soon and Lady Gaga would be begging her for a selfie.

Sadly, Jake found the address of the owner and Pimento got a little hopeful, which made Gina feel like the frown emoji internally.

“Suck it universe!” Jake exclaimed. Oh, no. She may not be as delusional as Pimento, but the universe was still the universe.

“Are you crazy?” Pimento and Gina both screamed at the exact same time. “Why would you even say that?”

She couldn’t stop them from going, though, but she was thinking of secretly wrecking Jake’s car, just in case. Once they arrived, Pimento and Jake got out of the car as fast as they could. At the same time, Gina elaborated the excuse that she had lost her phone somewhere in the car. Then, she cut some cables and put a device so the motor would overheat. She raised her leer once more, Jake and Pimento were ringing the bell and their backs were facing her. Perfect. She smirked.

“For the last time, I don’t have your earrings.” The owner was visibly tired of Pimento and Jake’s antics. “They didn’t survive the fire” _Oh damn_.

She wrinkled her eyebrows and rose her vocal pitch on purpose, acting concernedwhile fighting off her sarcasm, “Aww no, that is really bad.”

The owner slammed the door, Gina sighed and mirrored Jake’s movements acting defeated. That was until Pimento was so sure the owner actually had the earrings, claiming they had stolen all the items before burning down the store, just like a security fraud.

Gina rolled her eyes internally.

“She was wearing a necklace that I also pawned there.” Pimento said, supporting his theory.

“Ohhhh snap! Signs on sings on sings” Gina replied looking at Pimento incredulously. Funnily enough, she was screaming sarcasm inside her mind. Then, Pimento proposed to break into the house.

Gina, knowing that it was a crime and Jake was one of the few moral people who worked at the NYPD, thought it was the best idea to be on the same page as the hairy dude. “He’s right. Just use the lattice. The upstairs window’s open.”

“No!”

“Nice!!” Pimento left immediately.

“What are you doing?!” Jake whispered.

“I’m trying to make this wedding happen. What are you doing?” _Lie_.

“Trying to keep us out of prison.” Finally, Jake gave in until they found Pimento on the roof. They broke into the room while Pimento confirmed that they stole everything. And he was right, everything was here. Gina’s mouth dried and her breath stopped briefly.

Jake was trying to make Pimento leave immediately, while Pimento was looking for the earrings and, at the same time, threatening to burn this place to the ground.

She looked around with feverish eyes until she found something that would alert the owners. Perhaps they would all end up in prison, but Gina wasn’t thinking clearly. Her heartbeat was raising, she was sweating while acting fast and impulsively.

“Check it out! Rainstick. Keeping it”

“No, you’re not. That is a crime” Jake affirmed.

“Untrue, once you steal something, none of your stuff belongs to you.” She hadn’t stolen a single thing since she went to therapy, but for this cause, it was worth it. Jake begged her to put it down. Gina obeyed him making noise with the rainstick.

“Gina, be a quieter robber!!”

“But you told me to put it down.”

“YOU’REBREAKING INTO MY HOUSE?!!!” with a loud bang, the owner screamed desperately. He was so red and his neck vein was popping.

“Or you are breaking into our house?” All of her anxious energy was deflected with humor.

“Hey, I found the earrings” Gina mentally facepalmed herself. Apparently, all of her precious effort and superior acting skills were for nothing. After Pimento threatened to burn the house again and Jake confronted the owners, Gina closed the door with her feet, allowing them to escape through the window.

In the car, Gina was feeling ecstatic. The fall from the building kept her adrenaline levels high, and the fact that she had stolen something for the first time after almost a year gave her an extra thrill. However, what was going to happen next made her stomach flutter, her heart race causing her giddiness. The stars were aligned to her favor today.

A metallic clank was suddenly heard. Since none of them were watching, she grinned, but quickly swapped her smile to a turned one. A lot of smoke invaded the car, Jake assured that this had never happened before.

He asked Gina to call a tow truck, while Adrian was lamenting how the universe didn’t want him to marry Rosa. “Gina, when’s the tow truck getting here?”

“No idea, I’m talking to my spiritual advisor. He says we have an engine problem.”

“Yeah, I know, that’s why I said call a tow truck!”

Gina kept playing dumb raising her eyebrows, “So you meant my spiritual advisor is right?”

“Guys! This is my fault. I should’ve just given up when fate burned down the pawn shop, okay” Pimento added. “Stupid Adrian. Stupid Adrian. Idiot, read the signs!!!” He started to break down, hitting his head, getting desperate.

Gina almost felt bad. Well, she did feel bad, traces of guilt run in her system, but she was not gonna show it easily. She reached his shoulder and comforted him so he could calm down. Maybe what she’d been doing wasn’t a good idea, Rosa obviously loved him and if he backed down, the love of her life would feel heartbroken. She wanted Rosa to be happy with or without her. I hurt to think about it, but it was time to face the real world.

Jake finally had enough of both of them, until he saw a sign of a heliport.

* * *

Gina wished she wasn’t there. She was on board with the wedding now, but she’d rather not see it. It’d be too suspicious if she ran away before the ceremony, though. Sitting on the chair, she was uninterested. It was better to check her phone again and distract herself with Solange’s new Instagram stories. She laughed at the silliness of the replies.

The sound of Jake’s voice interrupted her. _Ugh, what now?_

“Hey there, everyone. Great wedding so far, right?” Jake walked right to the altar.

“Uh, next step up, we’re gonna take a quick break, which happens at every wedding, but in the meantime, how about a little entertainment? Boyle? You got your devil sticks?” She could sense something was seriously wrong. Gina followed Jake until she found him talking to Adrian.

“Telling myself what?” Gina heard Pimento exalted.

She grimaced, “Yeah, telling himself what?”

“What are you doing here?” Jake squashed his eyebrows together.

“I’m a part of this journey. Don’t you dare to try to cut me out.” Gina was visibly annoyed and tired of everything. All she wanted is to go home.

“Look I spent the whole day denying the fact that there were signs, but I was wrong.” Jake assured him. “There were actually there.”

“So far, duh.” Pimento frowned.

“… the fact that you kept canceling your own wedding … that was the real sign.” Gina knew where this was going. In part was the things she did, but primary, it was Adrian deep down not ready to get married.

“Whoaaa, you took the situation and you flip pity-flopped it.” Gina added.

“I was my own sign the whole time?” Adrian’s mouth fell. “Wow, that’s a real M. Night Shyamalan twist the— oh!” His eyes flew out of his orbits. “Signs!!”

Gina and Jake gasped sarcastically.

“Wait, do you think he’s behind all of this?”

“I do not” Jake answered.

“I should go talk to Rosa. Thanks, Jake” Pimento patted his shoulder while Gina nodded in agreement. She felt like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Today’s been such a rollercoaster of emotions.

“Jake, you done good, kid.” She put her elbow on his shoulder. “Glad I took you along for the ride.” Her blue eyes shined.

She proceeded to leave, going back to her seat. What a tumultuous day.

Solemn music invaded Shaw’s until she saw Rosa, hand in hand with Pimento. Looking up, her heart leaped while checking the bride out. As soon as they turned around, Gina’s brain couldn’t function anymore, she was bewitched by Rosa’s beauty. The white dress and red lipstick were enchanting.

She could see herself walking down the altar with Rosa, wearing a dress as fabulous as hers. Gina’s told herself to slow down. She knew that despite the cancellation of the wedding, it was very unlikely the couple would split. _You’re better than hopeless sad people who fantasize with their unrequited crushes._

“All right, we have an announcement to make.” Pimento said to the audience.

“We’re not getting married.” Rosa went straight to the point, without beating around the bush. A gospel chorus of disappointed ‘awwwww’ filled the room.“You can shove those awws up your butts.” She continued aggressively, her eyes protruding.That’s the Rosa she knew.

“Or I’ll come up there and I’ll do it for ya.” Adrian continued what Rosa was saying, backing her up.

“We feel like we’re rushing things, we love each other, but we haven’t even really spent that much time together. We’ve never even been on a real date, so we’re gonna start there” The audience broke into rhythmic applause, while Gina clapped at a slower tempo.

It was such a bittersweet moment for her. Everything was overwhelming. She didn’t know how to feel about this. One part of her felt relieved that her plan, after all, did work and there was no more wedding. The other part of her was heartbroken that they were going to still be together and maybe their relationship would get stronger. Even if things with Adrian didn’t work out, Rosa would never return her feelings.

Ever.

It was time to move on.

Several months later, she met Milton Boyle.

* * *

Not even Milton could make her feelings for Rosa disappear completely. It didn’t matter, she lost her chance many years ago for being clueless. Yes, Gina Linetti admitted that she fucked it up. 

It was clear that Rosa had moved on from her, and she should too.

Gina continued drinking until there were no more tears in her eyes. It helped to cope with the pain, albeit in an unhealthy way. All she needed was to minimize her interactions with Rosa and have lots of casual sex. Maybe she should have quit the 99 and not let her post-pregnancy hormones change her mind after Charles and Amy’s speech. That was her last thought before her mind traveled to her subconscious Gina-centric universe, where she was Beyoncé’s best friend and where she morphed into the brightest star of our cosmos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this wasn't too bad. Please leave kudos or a comment if you want, whether if it's for praise or constructive criticism. I need validation :)

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if my english isn't perfect, it's not actually my first language, or if some of the characters were a little OOC. If there's a mistake, you can leave constructive criticism. Please leave a comment or kudos


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